Speaker 1: 0:02

If you're a whiny snowflake that can't handle the truth, is offended by the word fuck and about 37 uses of it in different forms gets ass hurt. When you hear someone speak the absolute, real and raw truth, you should leave Like right now. This is Shut Up and Choose, the podcast where we cut through the shit and get real about weight loss, life and everything in between. We get into the nitty gritty of making small, smart choices that add up to big results. From what's on your plate to how you approach life's challenges. We'll explore how the simple act of choosing differently can transform your health, your mindset and your entire freaking life. So if you're ready to cut through the bullshit and start making some real changes, then buckle up and shut up, because we're about to choose our way to a healthier, happier life. This is Shut Up and Choose. Let's do this Now. Your host, jonathan Ressler.

Speaker 2: 1:13

Hey, welcome back to Shut Up and Choose the podcast where we talk about the toys and the bullshit that's out there on the internet Instagram gurus who think they know what the fuck they're talking about, when in reality, they're just trying to tell you shit and sell you shit that you absolutely positively do not need. So today, what I want to talk about is I want to actually give you guys a love letter for all those people out there that are clinging to those rigid food rules and wondering why none of it ever sticks, why nothing works. So I'm going to start out like this Meal plans are basically adult lunchables for people who don't want to think. If I had a dollar for every time, someone said to me, can you just tell me exactly what to eat? I'd be sipping espresso and rum and eating croissants in Florence without ever getting on another phone call or Zoom call or talk to a new client. Look, I get it. Meal plans feel safe, they're predictable, they're clean. Like oh, wow, I'm finally going to get it together. I just need that magic plan. You know something color-coded with macros and shopping lists and maybe a barcode tattooed on my fucking arm so I don't screw it up. And then for a week or maybe even two weeks. It works until life punches you in the face. Until your boss moves a meeting, your kid pukes on the carpet or someone invites you to dinner and then, uh-oh, what you're about to eat isn't on the sacred plan and just like that you're spiraling into fries and the classical eyes. Meh, fuck it, I'll just start over Monday. Classicalize fuck it, I'll just start over Monday. Here's the problem. Meal plans are just adult Lunchables. You know what that shit is? Those nasty things. They're tidy, they're prepackaged, they look good on paper, but they are not designed to survive real life.

Speaker 2: 2:58

This episode is not about bashing structure. I love structure. I live by frameworks. What I don't love when people use meal plans as a way to avoid responsibility, as a way to say I don't want to think, I don't want to decide, I don't want to learn, I just want someone to boss me around until I lose weight. And if that sounds familiar, hey, you've been on a diet before, because that's what a diet is. If you've ever downloaded some random influencer's 30-day meal plan and stuck to it for like five days and crashed face first into a pepperoni pizza because you did not handle an unplanned dinner, you're in the right place.

Speaker 2: 3:34

Today we're going to unpack the real reason that those meal plans fail. And it's not because you failed, it's because they don't teach you how to live, they just teach you how to follow. My whole philosophy, my whole mantra is stop dieting, start choosing right. So let's talk about why that makes so much sense. Let's talk about why rigid a rigid plan is just fragile. Why just tell me what to eat? That bullshit is a trap. It's not a solution and how you can build a flexible food system that you can actually stick with even when life gets fucked up. Because you don't need another PDF for steamed broccoli and chicken. Come on, you need tools, you need skills. You need to stop eating like a robot and start thinking like the real, dynamic human being that you are. So let's get into it, okay. So let's get one thing straight People love meal plans.

Speaker 2: 4:26

People love, love, love meal plans. They really do. Meal plans are like weighted blankets for people who have been burned by every diet they've ever tried. They're comforting, they give the illusion of control, they whisper sweet nothings like you don't have to figure anything out, I'll do the thinking, you just follow orders and everything will be fine. And honestly, truthfully, that kind of sounds amazing for like five minutes. Because meal plans are safe in the way that IKEA furniture instructions are safe. Sure, the diagram looks simple. Right, we've all looked at them. All the parts are there. You just follow the steps 1 through 47, and boom, you have a fully assembled life. But the second you lose that one tiny screw. You can't find that nut or real life enters the room, everything falls apart. So let's break that down.

Speaker 2: 5:12

People absolutely crave certainty. They're tired of overthinking food, tired of guessing, tired of decision fatigue. So when someone offers them a magic meal plan with all the answers, they grab it like it's the last bottle of Ozempic at some fancy Walgreens and for a few days it works. You eat the oatmeal, you steam the chicken, you meal prep like a TikTok productivity coach on Adderall. You got the color-coded Tupperware, the fridge that looks like a Pinterest board and the confidence of somebody who definitely hasn't spiraled into a bag of pretzels at 10 pm for at least like 48 hours. But here's the thing that nobody really wants to admit Meal plans work great until the world dares to not revolve around your Tupperware. Your schedule changes, your kids get sick, your boss schedules a last-minute meeting, your partner wants to go out for sushi, your best friend is crying and needs you and suddenly your grilled chicken and quinoa plan is about as relevant as a DVD player. And now what? Now you feel like a failure, like you've blown it Because your precious plan didn't account for real life, because the reality is it never does.

Speaker 2: 6:21

Here's the truth. Meal plans don't fail because you're weak. They fail because they're fragile. They're based on this fantasy. Your day will unfold perfectly and you always have access to the exact foods that you've prepped and that nothing unexpected will ever happen. And when that fantasy gets wrecked by something that's based as a traffic or a work happy hour, you're left with no tools, no plan B, just guilt, frustration and probably a burger or pizza that you weren't supposed to eat. That's not structure, that's a setup.

Speaker 2: 6:54

Meal plans don't teach you how to eat. They teach you how to comply. They train you to follow, not adapt, and the second life throws you a curveball, which it always does. You don't know how to pivot. So what happens? You say, screw it. You eat like a raccoon in a gas station and you swear you'll get back on track Monday. That sound familiar to you, does to me, does to me for 59 years.

Speaker 2: 7:19

That's the way I thought, and the truth is it's not because you suck, it's because you were set up with a system that requires perfection, and human beings aren't built for perfection, they're built for resilience. That's the real problem. Rigid plans are comforting, but they're also brittle. They snap the second. There's pressure, and if you don't have the skills to adjust, if you haven't learned how to think through food choices on the fly, you'll always fall apart when things go off plan. That is why people bounce from plan to plan like bad relationships.

Speaker 2: 7:55

We've all said these things. I know I've said them hundreds of times. This one's different. This one really gets me. This one's going to work. But it's not different, it's just shiny. It's just shinier. It's just a new PDF, and unless you change your mindset, it'll crash and burn like all the others. So let's stop pretending.

Speaker 2: 8:13

The answer is another hyper-controlled, pre-measured plan that tells you exactly what to eat, when to eat it and what brand of sadness dressing to use on your kale. You don't need more obedience, you need more skill. You need to learn how to eat in the real world, with meetings, kids cravings, stress, vacations, birthdays, sushi nights and, yeah, the occasional impulse piece of cake or cupcake. Because if your food system can't survive a single detour from the plan, it's not a system, it's a ticking time bomb dressed up as a solution. And that's what I want to dismantle in this episode.

Speaker 2: 8:53

So let's talk about that fragility, not like a glass vase kind, the meal plan kind. You know what breaks faster than your motivation on a Sunday night. A rigid food plan trying to survive a real human life. Let's make this crystal fucking clear Rigid equals fragile, flexible equals resilient. It's not a motivational quote, that's just biology, it's physics and that's real life. Because when you build eating habits on a plan that only works on the perfect conditions, you're setting yourself up for collapse.

Speaker 2: 9:26

The moment anything and I mean anything goes off script. And let me be the one to remind you although I'm sure you don't need this reminder life is never on script. Here's what rigid systems do? They give you the short-term illusion of success. They'll help you feel in control until you're not. They reward you for obedience, not for learning, and they punish you hard when you slip up, even a little. Of course I know for most of you. For me, that sounds familiar. That's not structure, though. That's a nutritional hostage situation.

Speaker 2: 9:59

Meal plans don't teach you how to eat. They teach you how to follow, which you know, I guess, feels good for a little while. Following is easy. There's no questions, no decisions, no gray areas. You're a robot. Food input, a output, calorie deficit, boom problem solved right. Well, that's completely wrong. I know you know that, because as soon as things stop going exactly according to plan which again they always will you don't know how to respond. You don't have the reps, you don't have the mental muscle to pivot. And then what happens? You fall off, you slip, you ghost your goals and you tell yourself the same lie again I just need to try harder next time. But it's not about trying harder, it's about building something that can actually handle real life.

Speaker 2: 10:44

Think about it A rigid diet plan is like a house of cards. It looks great from a distance, it's delicate, it's detailed, it's impressive. But the second there's a breeze or you know a spontaneous brunch invite, it collapses. A flexible system though, that's like a tree like a palm tree here in Florida. It bends, it weathers storms, it adapts to seasons, it doesn't crumble when the wind blows and it just keeps growing.

Speaker 2: 11:10

So let's stop glamorizing plans that require you to be perfect. They're not going to work. You're not going to be perfect. You never will be. Your schedule isn't perfect, your cravings aren't perfect, your kids, your job, your emotional stability not perfect. So why the hell are you still trying to follow a system that demands perfection? Here's the truth.

Speaker 2: 11:31

Meal plans don't fail because you suck. They fail because they don't teach you how to live. They don't teach you how to eat on a weird travel schedule or navigate restaurant menus or make trade-offs or handle a 3 pm snack craving that hits like a freight train. All they teach you is how to stick to the script that you didn't write and you weren't meant to live off somebody else's script. You need something that works with your life, not against it. You need something that teaches you how to adjust, not punish you for being human, because when you rely on a rigid system to feel successful, every deviation from that system feels like a failure.

Speaker 2: 12:07

And let me tell you, nothing kills progress faster than convincing yourself you've failed just because your Tuesday didn't look like your spreadsheet. That is why people binge, that is why people yo-yo, that is why people stay stuck, not because they lack willpower, not because they don't want it badly enough, but because they're stuck in a cycle following a fragile system that cracks under pressure and they've never been taught how to bounce back. So here's your wake-up call you don't need another reset. You need a better strategy, something that's sustainable, something that bends and flexes and adapts, something that teaches you how to live, not how to temporarily behave until you crack and start over again. So I'm going to show you how to actually build that kind of system, how to think, how to plan and eat like a real fucking person with a real life, and still make progress.

Speaker 2: 13:01

Because we're done with the lunchable thing, right, let's learn how to cook, metaphorically and literally. Let's build a system that doesn't fall apart every time life shows up. Let's stop asking what to eat and start learning how to think. All right, look we, I've torn the meal plan shit to shreds. I ripped apart the fantasy. Hopefully dismantle the pdf prison you keep downloading every January, every month, like it's going to save your life.

Speaker 2: 13:26

This time it's not. It's not going to work. But here's the part where most people freeze If I'm not following a strict meal plan, then what the fuck am I supposed to do? Don't worry, I'm going to tell you, because this isn't about eating whatever you feel like and hoping for the best. It's not chaos, it's not winging it. I always say, look, I lost over 140 pounds and never gave up the foods I love, and that's true. But what this is about is it's building a system, a flexible, repeatable, real-life, friendly food system that doesn't fall apart every time you get a flat tire or have to eat at a chain restaurant.

Speaker 2: 14:02

So here's your new mantra Don't follow a plan, build a framework. A plan is someone else's idea of what you should eat in a perfect week. A framework is your system for making aligned food decisions, for making those small, smart choices, no matter what week you're in. And it all starts out, really, with three things structure, preferences and flexibility. So the first thing is you got to build your anchor meals. Anchor meals are your go-to, no-brainer, easy to make meals that hit the basics and they're simple A protein you like, a carb that doesn't suck, a vegetable that you don't hate and a flavor that you actually enjoy. These aren't sad, steamed Tupperware disasters that you're eating on some fucking meal plan. These are the meals you like and trust, meals you could throw together at home or out, even without blowing up your goals. So here's just a couple examples Some ground turkey tacos with avocado and salsa.

Speaker 2: 15:04

Some rotisserie chicken I lived on rotisserie chicken, but rotisserie chicken, microwave rice and roasted veggies. Some Greek yogurt, some fruit and nuts for breakfast. That doesn't feel like punishment. Or, as you know, my old favorite is make overnight oats and eat that every morning. They're simple. You should have three to five of those on deck at all times. These are your home base. When things get crazy, you fall back on these, not Uber Eats and panic.

Speaker 2: 15:30

So the second thing is embrace the core five rule. The core five are foods that you always keep in rotation. They're your staples. They're convenient, they're satisfying and they're flexible, and they're probably what you think it could be eggs, frozen veggies, some protein bars or shakes, whole grain wraps, pre-cooked chicken or lean deli meat. You're not building a plan around these. You're building a system where you always have something to fall back on, even when your fridge is kind of empty and your brain's low on battery.

Speaker 2: 16:01

Third thing is think in time blocks, not meal slots. Stop obsessing what to eat at 7.30 am on Wednesday. That's how you build a plan you'll fucking hate. Instead, ask what kind of foods make sense for busy mornings, what's realistic for a rushed lunch on office days, or what can I prep in advance so dinner doesn't feel like a crisis. And that's how you build categories, not boxes. You want to feel like you have options, not rules. This doesn't work. If you're following a rigid plan, you do not want rules.

Speaker 2: 16:35

And then the fourth thing is practice the 80-20, not all or nothing rule. I've said this a thousand times, but keep it simple. 80% of your meals should be aligned with your goal. 20% should be flexible, fun, social or just fucking really good, and they feed your soul. That's how I ate birthday cake without crying. That's how I ate donuts. That's how you can say yes to dinner out without unbuttoning your pants and feeling like a pig.

Speaker 2: 17:01

Because consistency is what drives progress, not obsession. And no one got fat from eating pasta once. I can assure you of that. But plenty of people stayed stuck because they kept quitting, and every time they ate pasta or anything else, they're oh, I blew it. I got to start from the beginning.

Speaker 2: 17:19

The next thing you need to do is learn to self-coach. Just ask better questions. Make better choices. Instead of what do I eat, which people ask me all the time. How do you tell me what to eat? No, ask what's the choice that supports who I want to become right now. How can I make this easier for the future me? Or, if this meal isn't perfect, how can I still make it better than yesterday?

Speaker 2: 17:41

You're not building perfection. You're building identity, and that's what real change looks like. So you don't need more willpower. You need a system that works with your actual life, one that bends and flexes and evolves, one that can survive a sick kid, a bad day or a spontaneous fucking date night. Plans fall apart. Frameworks keep going. So stop trying to impress with your meal prep containers right. Build habits that actually serve you, because when you learn how to think, not just follow, you never have to start over again. So look, if you're still waiting for someone to tell you what to eat, you're not stuck. You're also outsourcing. All right, I've torn down the fantasy of the rigid plans replaced with a flexible, functioning framework that actually works in real life. But here's the next big shift you got to stop being a follower and start thinking like a decision maker, because, as if every food decision still feels like a test you're trying to pass, you're doing it wrong. Your meals shouldn't require approval from your coach, from your tracking app or from some faceless fucking idiot influencer who only eats beige food out of plastic containers. You don't need that and you don't need another food list. You need to stop fearing food like it's a landmine and start making choices like an adult who understands their body, their goals and their context. So how do you do that? Well, I'm glad you asked, because I'm going to break that down for you too.

Speaker 2: 19:09

Step one is definitely ask better questions. Most people ask shitty questions like is this good or bad? Can I have this on my plan? You know how many times I've said can I have this on my plan? Will this ruin my progress, my plan? You know how many times I've said can I have this on my plan? Will this ruin my progress? Let's kind of upgrade that internal dialogue. Okay, let's start asking what does my body actually need right now? Believe me, you know, your body knows, your brain knows and you know. So stop bullshitting.

Speaker 2: 19:32

People Ask will this leave me feeling satisfied or sluggish? We all know the answer to that question when we're eating that quote unquote bad food. Or ask what's the most supportive option available to me at this moment Not the best option I can have, but what's available to me at this moment. And last is is this aligned with who I'm becoming? Because you're not in food prison, you're in real fucking life and in real life, asking the right questions beats following the perfect plan every time. And we talked about real life Use that real life filter.

Speaker 2: 20:06

Before you eat anything, run it through this filter. Do I like this food? Yeah, that matters. That's an important thing. If you don't like the food, you're going to be fucking miserable. So first question is do I like this food? Second is does it leave me energized, not bloated, sleepy or still feeling hungry in an hour? Ask that question. Three can I reasonably eat it again this week without losing my mind? If you can't eat it twice in a week, it's dog shit, okay. And last question is does this choice move me closer to or further from my goals? If you can hit three out of four of those congratulations. You're making a good choice. You're making a solid, small, smart choice Because, again, this is not about eating perfectly, it's about eating intentionally, eating like a person who lives in their body, not one who's just trying to survive until they can get to the fucking cheat day.

Speaker 2: 20:58

Third one, and I'm going to be honest here, I didn't do this, I did it mentally, but I certainly didn't do it physically. But it's important, and especially if you're a write it down kind of person journal, to rewire your food brain, because I get you're going to roll your eyes and you say this isn't like some dear diary bullshit no, it's not, but it's two minutes a day, one of the fastest ways to retrain your brain around food. Here's what to do in the morning. Okay, today I'm the kind of person who blanks, fill in the blank and it could be prioritizes hydration fuels with intention, listens to how you eat without guilt, whatever it is, but just write it down in your journal If you're a journaler. If you're not, just think about that question at night. This is a big one, because I did think about this a lot At night.

Speaker 2: 21:42

You say what choice aligned with the version of me that I'm becoming. Where did I make an emotional or impulsive choice and what was really going on? That's it Awareness, action, reflection. You don't have to be perfect, no-transcript. The next thing I want you to do is create, basically, a decision menu, right?

Speaker 2: 22:02

So if you're feeling overwhelmed, build yourself a cheat sheet, literally write it down Three breakfast options you like and trust. For me it was overnight oats. I've said that a thousand times, but I'll say it another thousand because it was a great thing for me. So think of three breakfast options you like and trust. Think of three lunch ideas you can default to three dinners that don't stress you out and three snacks that leave you satisfied. Put it on your fridge and your note apps, whatever. It doesn't matter where you put it, but that becomes your backup system when decision fatigue hits, because sometimes you're not stuck, you're just tired, and tired brains don't make good choices without a little nudge. And then, of course, the last thing you know I've said this again another thing that I've said a thousand times kill that all or nothing mentality.

Speaker 2: 22:46

You got to get over that. Let's make one thing non-negotiable move forward. You are never one meal, one snack or one off plan choice away from failure. You're always one better decision away from momentum. So if you had pizza at lunch, cool, big fucking deal. Drink some water, eat a decent dinner and keep moving.

Speaker 2: 23:04

Progress isn't about what you ate at noon. It's about whether you quit at 12 or 1. So if you think you need to be perfect to make progress, you're going to keep quitting every time. You're human, so knock that shit off. You're better than that. You know more now, so you don't need someone standing over you telling you what to eat every day. You need to trust that you can figure it out and guess what you can. You're capable of making aligned choices, even in messy moments. You're capable of learning from mistakes instead of turning them into full-blown disasters, and you're capable of building a way of eating that you don't need to start over from every single Monday, and that, honestly, that's the real flex. So stop waiting for the next food guru, some jerk off on the internet, some plan or program, to give you the answers. Start becoming the kind of person who already has them, because you earn them. So let me try to bring it all together and bring it home. If you've made it this far, you're officially done pretending that the answer to your weight loss struggle lives inside someone else's fucking PDF, because now you know the truth.

Speaker 2: 24:09

Meal plans are not magic. They're just organized guesses that fall apart the moment real life happens. They feel safe because they take away the decisions right. They feel productive because they give you something to follow. But following doesn't build skills. Following doesn't build confidence and following definitely doesn't build a system that survives Monday morning chaos, surprise sushi dinners or the kind of week where everything feels like a fucking dumpster fire.

Speaker 2: 24:37

Here's what does Flexible systems, repeatable habits, foods that you actually like, decisions you know how to make on your own and a mindset that says one-off moment doesn't define me because I bounce back. You don't need another meal plan that dies the moment your kid gets sick or your co-workers order tacos for lunch. You need a way of eating that adapts to your life, not one that constantly asks you to pause your life to keep going. You need to stop asking what should I eat and start asking what kind of person am I choosing to be today? That's how this becomes sustainable. That's how this becomes yours, not some jerk-off who made up a system that in theory would work if you could be perfect. It becomes yours.

Speaker 2: 25:26

And remember the core truth of this whole episode is meal plans don't fail because you suck. They fail because they don't teach you how to live. And now you have the tools to do that with anchor meals, core food staples, real life food filters, better internal questions, a bounce back mindset and, most importantly, your brain turned back on, because you're not a robot, you're not an autopilot. You're someone who's finally starting to eat with intention, not just obedience. So that's kind of it.

Speaker 2: 26:02

But if this episode helped you snap out of the meal plan chasing the all or nothing, the perfection trap, do me a favor and do someone else a favor. Share it. Send it to a friend who's on their fifth clean eating challenge this year. Post it on your stories with the line hey, I don't follow meal plans anymore, I follow my fucking brain. Or maybe you don't want to use a curse but say I follow my damn brain, I don't know. Use a curse but say I follow my damn brain, I don't know. And if you want a copy of my real life food framework the same one that I use with all my clients who actually lose weight and keep it off, just DM me. No more Lunchables on Instagram and I'll send it over to you. I'll send you a PDF, which sounds funny after I've been shitting on PDFs, but this is basically a recap of what I talked about today, because you don't need to be perfect. You need to be prepared, you need to be honest and you need to shut up and choose. So that's it for meal plans and meal preps. You know I fucking hate them. I think it's a complete waste of time.

Speaker 2: 26:51

If you want to find out and follow my journey of how I lost 140 pounds, you can buy my book on Amazon. It's called shut up and choose. We're an Amazon bestseller. I always talk about it. I'm not going to waste your time, but you can get it on amazoncom. If you're more of a visual learner, I have a video course. It's called the effortless weight loss Academy. You can get that at learnshutupandchoosecom. That's learnshutupandchoosecom. If you're looking for one-on-one coaching, go check out my website, jonathanwrestlercom. It tells you everything you need. I also offer group coaching. At any rate, it's been a pleasure to be here. I love talking to you guys. It honestly keeps me on track myself and you know how to do this thing. You know how to lose the weight and you know how to keep it out.

Speaker 1: 27:31

I mean really Now the only thing left to do is to shut up and choose. You've been listening to Shut Up and Choose. Jonathan's passion is to share his journey of shedding 130 pounds in less than a year without any of the usual gimmicks no diets, no pills. And we'll let you in on a little secret no fucking gym. And guess what? You can do it too. We hope you enjoyed the show. We had a fucking blast. If you did, make sure to like, rate and review. We'll be back soon, but in the meantime, find Jonathan on Instagram at JonathanWrestlerBocaRaton. Until next time, shut up and choose.